Someone on the internet spent what sounds like several weeks in hand-to-hand combat with a tube of Aquaphor that survived a full laundry cycle, including the dryer, and lived to stain several garments. They documented everything. Eleven things that failed. One absurd three-step ritual that finally worked. The whole post reads like a boss fight walkthrough, and I mean that as a compliment.

The winning method involved WD-40, baking soda worked in with a toothbrush, an overnight Dawn soak, and a prayer to whatever gods oversee domestic chemistry. It caused some small holes in the fabric. The person described it as “the most annoying method by far,” which is a sentence I respect deeply for its honesty.