The internet delivered something brilliant this week - a tradie wandering into a corporate discussion forum asking for translations of business jargon. What followed was comedy gold that had me laughing harder than I have in months. Someone managed to decode our entire corporate vocabulary with the precision of a surgeon and the wit of a stand-up comedian.

“What is a Big 4? Caravan park.” “What is a stakeholder? Complains, does nothing.” “What is a Gantt chart? Lies in rainbow.”

The digital world never ceases to amaze me with its peculiar approach to seemingly simple problems. Discord’s latest feature rollout - the ability to “ignore” users - has got me thinking about how we handle uncomfortable social situations in our increasingly online world.

Remember the good old days when ignoring someone meant literally pretending they weren’t there at the pub? Now we need software features to achieve the same effect, and somehow, they still don’t quite get it right. Discord’s new ignore feature joins their existing block feature in what feels like a masterclass in unnecessarily complicated solutions.

The other day, while updating my details at the local pharmacy, I witnessed something that made my inner tech worker cringe. The customer ahead of me recited their phone number in what can only be described as a freestyle jazz interpretation of numerical sequences. “Oh-four-triple-two-double-five-eight-nine…” They might as well have been reading out their grocery list.

Let’s be real here - there’s a proper way to format Australian mobile numbers, and it’s 4-3-3. That’s it. End of story. It’s not just about being pedantic (though I’ll admit there’s a bit of that); it’s about clear communication and reducing errors. Every mobile phone system, every web form, and every database is designed around this format. It’s not a coincidence.