When Your Childhood Teddy Bear Looks Like It Needs an Exorcist
The internet never fails to deliver a good laugh, and today’s gem involves a 60-year-old teddy bear that looks like it might have witnessed the fall of empires - or possibly caused them. The poor thing’s owner innocently asked for washing advice, and the responses were absolutely priceless, ranging from “holy water” to “flamethrower.”
Looking at this weathered old bear, with its slightly askew features and well-worn fabric, brought back memories of my own childhood teddy, Mr. Buttons, who thankfully looked more “loved” than “likely to steal your soul.” He’s still sitting in a box somewhere in my garage, probably wondering why he got replaced by an iPad.
The comments section erupted with suggestions about exorcisms and priests, which had me cackling in my home office. Someone even pointed out there are different grades of holy water - who knew? Apparently, there’s regular holy water and then there’s the premium stuff for serious demon-banishing needs. Makes you wonder if there’s a holy water sommelier out there somewhere.
But beneath all the supernatural jokes, there were actually some really practical cleaning suggestions. The standout advice involved carefully removing the stuffing (brave soul who volunteered that idea), hand washing the exterior, and either returning the original stuffing or replacing it with new material. Though honestly, given the bear’s age, that stuffing probably contains enough historical DNA to clone several generations.
Reading through all this reminded me of visiting the Melbourne Museum with my kid last year, where they have some seriously old toys on display. It’s fascinating how these personal artifacts carry so much history and meaning. Sure, this particular bear might look like it’s seen things that would make Stephen King nervous, but it’s also a 60-year-old family heirloom that’s survived decades of love, play, and who knows what else.
The fact that the owner mentioned their dad’s delight in creeping people out with it makes it even better. There’s something wonderfully Australian about that kind of humor - taking something that looks legitimately unsettling and turning it into a source of family entertainment. It’s the same spirit that has us introducing tourists to drop bears with a completely straight face.
Between the practical washing advice and the exorcism suggestions, the whole thread became this brilliant mixture of genuine helpfulness and comedy gold. Someone even suggested putting it in a pillowcase before washing, though another user quickly added “and tie it to a brick before dropping it in the ocean.”
The real charm of this story isn’t just in the bear’s admittedly creepy appearance, but in how it’s still treasured despite (or perhaps because of) looking like it might be the star of the next great horror film. It’s a reminder that sometimes the most precious things in our lives aren’t the pristine, perfect items, but the weird, slightly unsettling ones that come with decades of stories and memories attached.
Though if that bear starts moving on its own, I’m backing those “cleanse it with fire” suggestions 100%.